Half asleep

So yes getting to bed way past my bedtime last night like probably after 11pm. I normally try to go to bed around 8 or 9pm and try for my 8 to 9 hours of sleep. Kinda funny how that just worked out....I didn't realize my bedtime and hours of sleep matched up. The sleep doesn't always workout because sometimes I lay in bed hoping to go to sleep, probably thinking of the barbell. Ok not always but it sounded good. I am not that obsessed! Well at least not all the time.

Was very surprised my weight this morning still 149lbs. My weight doesn't usually stay that low for very long but I am not sure I have always been perfect on my diet for very long so we will see how that works out. I am sure I won't be going down a weight class or anything. The lowest I have been is 148lbs at All Star Fitness when I first lost all my weight. It was a fitness competition but I have to say I did starve myself to get to that. It was well worth it to wear the size 4 jeans which I would still fit in if it wasn't for my thighs.

Breakfast consists of 4 eggs mixed with some peppers and collard greens. I know that sounds disgusting but if you just put a few collard greens in and lots of seasoning they are quite as bad. I also have some mixed fruit (strawberries, blueberries, and grapes). I won't have to say what I eat everyday because I pretty much eat the same thing each day. My new naturopath has told me to differentiate so I do try to change the meat from chicken, turkey and fish. On occasion lean red meat. I try to mix up the veggies. On workout day I will have some complex carbs with breakfast, lunch and dinner such as sweet potato, whole wheat pasta, or brown rice. I have my 1 cup of coffee in the morning with cream and sugar. That is my indulgence. I have cut down to just 1 cup per day. If I want more I have decaf or substitute with a herbal non caffeinated tea. I also try to drink 3 to 4 liters of water per day. Rotating between regular water and coconut water. I hate water except evian (which would break the bank if I drank it all the time with that much water), so I have to find ways to make it better. I learned at the spa I go to serenity spa in tacoma that cucumbers in water is very tasty. Gives it a little flavor. I have also tried mint leaves, lemons, and limes or a combination. It has really been helping.

My softball game last night was incredible. No we didn't win but I felt like I was in the zone behind the plate. I felt like not one ball was getting past me. I always get to get ran over by the runners coming in but thanks to being in good shape I haven't gotten hurt. (knock on wood)  Hitting well not as great but hit one really good hit to the outfield and I hit another home run except the bat missed the ball somehow. lol But I sure swung that thing with all my might. So in real life I was out but I sure thought I was going somewhere. Oh well......It was all worth it. I love that feeling of being in the zone. Feeling like you can do anything and nothing is stopping you. No outside thoughts can come in. Yesterday was that kind of day. Now if I could only have those all the time.

Ok so I know I have been talking my head off but really enjoying writing at the moment. Very strange but it might be improving a bit to something people might want to read if not then you shouldn't have gotten this far into reading this post. Better scarf down the rest of my breakfast and get my lunch ready to frantically run out the door for work. At least spa day after work. Every Wednesday is spa day, makes me happy. :)
This picture below minus my little belly hanging out which is why is outfit is not in my wardrobe. I guess weightlifting makes you a little deformed when it comes to thighs. But don't let that stop you strong is the real sexy!!

3 more days until competition day......

So it turns out the world is not over and I can still lift heavy weight. What a relief!! Today I had to work all day so didn't even have too much time to think of lifting. I know I do need a life but I am very happy with mine. Some people garden, some sew, I lift heavy weight.

Today I was able to snatch 125lbs for 3 singles. 1st was a press out and the other 2 were not perfect but I stood up with it and completed the lift. That is good enough for me. Luckily I didn't try the dreaded 130lbs. I guess I will save that for the competition. That's right because I am going to go out there and nail 120 or 125 what ever I start with. Which means I will have my chance to conquer 130lbs. It will not get the best of me. I was also able to clean 180lbs for 3 singles. Now I say clean because I missed the first jerk and the next 2 I thought about it and did a little dip and said forget it I guess because I didn't go any further. That whole dip and drive thing went out the waist side. Just need to improve my jerk technique a bit to get under the bar a little more and I will be good to go with that weight. Elbows were a little low but standing up with it works for me. Enjoying a little pain in my wrist at the moment but wrist pain seems to go with the olympic lifting territory so it seems. Some ice and rest I will be good to go for Saturday.

Went out to dinner tonight for my idea of splurging at the moment and ate a spinach salad with chicken and goat cheese, topped with oil and vinegar. The lady did talk me into a couple slices of bread because she said it was whole grain I felt indulging was ok due to their being health benefits to whole grain. I guess I have to add my small cup of asparagus soup to the picture. Now not exactly sure what was in it but the asparagus part will work for me. I know I am really being a rebel now. Some people think I am insane which very well could be but hey we are all a little insane in different ways. My diet plan now consist of making sure everything I put in my mouth has some nutritional benefit. Also staying away from alcohol. Doesn't really make me feel very good anyway.

So all in all it has been a fantastic day even considering the fact that I worked all day but I love my job. I was about to give up on nursing a few years ago but now I feel like I have found my place. Along with working on my training certifications so I can train people on the side. First certification will be in October. I will start with Crossfit because I do learn better with a little hands on. Then heavy lifting and a dinner out with my hubby. Oh I can't forget my 9:30pm softball game that will be coming up. Way too late for a girl who needs a lot of sleep but I love softball so I will sacrifice. It's only one day per week. Each day is a new day and I will enjoy each one to the fullest.

Morning after

I am feeling better this morning. I haven't been so upset about a missed lift in a long time. I had myself really pumped up to conquer the 130lbs though. So worked up that when I didn't do it I felt devastated and let it mess up my whole workout.

This morning weight 149lbs. Lower then usual but feel I am eating enough food. Just been eating very very clean. Energy feels good. The way I am going to make myself feel better about the snatch for the moment is that I would be very happy if I can hit 125lbs on my snatch and 175lbs on my clean in competition. That 130lbs will have to wait to be conquered after I am done unless not worrying about it helps me conquer it before. ;)  Very possible. Worry doesn't do anybody any good.

My mom will be flying in on Friday and I am very very excited. She will come to see me at my competition on Saturday. Sunday and Monday we will all make a trip out to the san jaun islands for the first time and mount rainer to see some wild flowers. I  have always dreamed of seeing a field of wildflowers. Time for my dream to come true after being in Seattle for 3 years and not having made it up there to see them yet. You know we get busy in our lives and don't enjoy the little things. 

4 more days until competition......

This Saturday I will be attending the Bad Mother Open Weightlifting Championship. I have been doing really great with my lifts. Technique has made tremendous improvements and I feel my mental is very strong.

Last week I made a personal record on my clean and jerk of 180lbs. Today during my workout I worked on single reps preparing for competition. The snatch has been a little more of a struggle for me. I had gotten myself very pumped up today and told myself over and over I could snatch 130lbs. I have done it before and I know I can do it again. But then what confuses me is why don't I. There were so many improvements in my snatch today but instead of thinking of those I just keep thinking of the fact that I didn't finish the lift. On previous days I was cutting my pull short. Today I felt like my pull was better.

Sometimes I get into thinking too much about how repeat a good performance that I end up getting in my own way and messing it up. The way I have an incredible performance day is by letting it happen. You can't force it. You just have to step out of the way. I have a habit of being too hard on myself and sometimes letting the negative take over. Each day I am just going to continue to be as positive as I can and do the very best I can.

My ultimate goal this weekend is to improve my total. My last total was 129kg so I am looking to break 130kg and do it with better technique then I did 129kg. I would really like to qualify for nationals this year which is in July. I would have to break 144kg which I know if possible because in practice I am not that far away. My goal clean and jerk 185lbs and Snatch 135lbs. Of course I want more but setting smaller goals will keep you accomplishing.

Eating Healthy

At this point in my life I think of what food is healthy and what is not as common since. I have been starting to think that is either false or people are in so much denial that the common sense can't come through. Since I changed my life to doing everything possible to live as healthy as I can. I pay very close attention to what I put in my mouth everyday and what others choose to put in theirs. I have gone through many diet plans. Now I don't consider anything a diet I just think of how each thing I put in my mouth will benefit me or not benefit me. It's a way of life and a choice. How will this food make me feel. If it doesn't make me feel good why am I eating it?  I do remember when I was very unhealthy and unhappy I felt so bad everyday for so long I didn't even realize I felt bad anymore. Now that I know what feeling great is like I will never go back.

For over 2 weeks I have been absolutely perfect with my eating. No junk food and no alcohol.  Just enough complex carbs to support my workouts and energy and a little dairy. I focus on good quality food like organic as often as I can. Meats with no hormones and all natural. Most of the time eating leaner meats. Mostly chicken, turkey and fish. On occasion I will eat red meats. I make sure to have some healthy fats in my diet such as nuts, avocado and olive oil. I focus on well balanced meals so having protein, carbs, and fat with each meal so they all balance each other out. The one thing I have struggled with is my new naturopath wanted me to cut out coffee. Well I have cut down to one cup of coffee in the morning. A lot better then the two to four cups I was having in a day. I have tried not having any but seem to really struggle with energy throughout the day. I have heard coffee has some health benefits and maybe one day I will be able to wipe it out completely but that will take time.

Do you put much thought into what you eat and if not why?

Mental Strength

So I know I go quite a long time without writing in my blog. Then when I really get motivated to write I have too many things to write about. Then what usually happens is I start writing and become unhappy with how my thoughts are coming out. I think to myself who would want to read this. That is the negative side coming out. The truth is it wouldn't matter if anybody read it. All in all it only takes touching a few lives to make a difference.

I have done a pretty good amount of reading and work on improving my own mental strength. Developing mental strength is very challenging. Changing habits takes repetition. This morning I was reading through another blog and found a great letter. http://sageolylifting.blogspot.com/2010/07/what-is-mental-toughness.html.

My lifting has been improving greatly. Part of that comes from my mental improvements and some from physical technical improvements. I am happy with what I have accomplished so far and very much looking forward to the future and what I will be able to achieve. I don't think there is ever an end to furthering yourself and continuing to make yourself a better person. Now you definitely have to be happy with the steps along the way otherwise it is all kinda useless. I have figured out some of the key things that work best for me when I am lifting and during my life in general is when I clear my mind and let the positive thoughts wash out the negative. Figuring this out doesn't mean it is perfected by far but is for sure better then it was. Clearing your mind is not an easy thing to do. I have looked and practiced some visualization and meditation but not enough to really get better at it. Thinking positive thoughts are a little easier but that can also be kind of tricky because if you just say something positive and don't really believe what you are saying it doesn't do anything. It has to come from deep inside.

Try clearing your mind and think of nothing...... Not as easy as it sounds is it?  What about focusing on one thing....picturing a flower and not letting any other thoughts or images come it. That may be a little easier but still very challenging. I have tried focusing on each part of the body from top to bottom. You contract one area and then let it relax. One thing that seems to really help that I learned in hot yoga is if you take a deep breath in and count to 6. Make the breath slow and really feel it. Do that same thing while breathing out. It is hard to have too many other thoughts if you are deep in your breath.

Everyday I continually try to make improvements in my life and be happy each day for what I am able to accomplish. Not everyday will be sunshine and rainbows as some people put it, but if you put everything into each day then nothing else can be expected of you then that. What have you done recently for yourself? Have you told yourself something positive lately? Don't forget if you are not happy with yourself it is very hard to be happy with anything else.

Inspiration

I have really gotten into quotes lately. For someone like me who likes to think negative a lot, saying a positive quote really helps override those thoughts. That is the way to make a permanent change in your life is by repetition. If you think something positive you can't think something negative at the same time. So if I start to get down on myself on a day where I am struggling with my workout I have to start telling myself I can do it. Keep repeating successful words to myself. This can help someone with daily life situations also.

A great quote is from the movie Rocky Balboa when Rocky is talking to his son and says,
"Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place and I don't care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard ya hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done! Now if you know what you're worth then go out and get what you're worth. But ya gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody! Cowards do that and that ain't you! You're better than that! I'm always gonna love you no matter what. No matter what happens. You're my son and you're my blood. You're the best thing in my life. But until you start believing in yourself, ya ain't gonna have a life."

I am a big movie fan. I have to say the Rocky movies are very inspirational. There are so many others out there. We all need to remember that we are the ones that give our life its direction. Remember to dream and life everyday to the fullest. Enjoy every moment.