Saturday, January 11, 2014

Recovery continues


"The wound is the place where the Light enters you."

-  Rumi

Everybody is always telling me how positive I am. The truth is I don't really have a choice. If you don't stay positive I feel like that would be giving up. Don't get me wrong there are always some dark moments when dealing with challenges and obstacles. But you can't stay there. You have to keep pushing forward toward something better. Towards acceptance of what is. When you accept how things are then you find the power to move past it. 

I should count next time how many injections I get in my back but it's seems like a lot. I just say anywhere from 20-30 including the lidocaine. First they inject the lidocaine all over then they inject the combination of dextrose and saline for the prolotherapy treatment. This last time I about jumped off the table for each one. At one moment wanted to cry and she had to stop to give me a break which means it was bad. I can usually tolerate a lot. But this time I wasn't as sore. Of course sore from the needles and some bruising but I recovered pretty much in a day or so. Now when I say that I don't mean I am pain free but there is such a tremendous difference now then how things were for me a couple months ago. The progress is slow. So slow that you really have to pay attention to see it. But it's there and there is lots of hope. Now maybe I will never be an athlete again but maybe I will. The future and the unknown doesn't scare me anymore. I know that I will never give up.

This year is going to be very exciting. I started as a leader in a council at the healthcare organization I work for. Something I never would of pictured myself doing but others saw something in me that I didn't and here I am. More successful then I would of ever thought. It's not because I am extremely smart. But it is because of my determination. In every obstacle I have faced I found a way. I start my yoga teacher training next month. I move to a new apartment in about 4 weeks and I applied to the university of Washington Bachelor in nursing program starting in the fall. That is a lot to do this year along with my recovery but I am excited about all if it. Do I take on too much? Of course but nobody will be able to say that I didn't give life everything I got. 

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