Trial and error

I have definitely found out life is about trial and error. I have learned a lot from my trials lately. My personality is not wanting to do something half way. I want to go all the way and give it everything I got. Can be a very good but bad quality depending on what you do with it. The last couple years I have been working on Olympic weightlifting and trying to qualify for nationals. This year I found myself one competition and 4kg away and my body said no more. I got extreme pain in my knees and very bad pain in my shin when squatting. The knee pain has been described to me as chondromalacia patella and the shin pain still remaining a mystery but seems to be related to tight muscles primarily the calf.

This has forced me to take a step back. To rest, reevaluate and recover. I have changed my routine to doing some lifting, conditioning, and hot yoga. To my new goals being a healthier better rounded athlete. I do love competing so I don't think that will change. Now I will do some different kinds of competitions including Olympic weightlifting when I am well enough. My plan is though not to put so much pressure on myself. Some pressure pushes you too much will stop you in your tracks.

It is proven people do better when they are having fun. So set goals, push yourself to be the best you can be but remember even if not everything is accomplished you are miles ahead of where you would of been doing absolutely nothing.


“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

– Winston Churchill

Backing off

"Life's up and downs provide windows of opportunity to determine your values and goals. Think of using all obstacles as stepping stones to build the life you want."

- Marsha Sinetar


So lately my Olympic weightlifting has ran into a little speed bump. I have been slowed down by my body telling me that it needs a little extra attention. My knees have been gradually getting worse for a few months until suddenly it seems or suddenly I came out of denial I couldn't keep ignoring the signs. At first I went threw every possible stage, anger, denial, and wanting to just throw in the towel. Why don't I just quit? Well that does seem like the easiest thing to do doesn't it? When things get hard we get out. For me my exercise has become an obsession since I lost weight. Quitting hasn't really ever been an option for me even though I have given it a considerable amount of thought many times throughout my life. But now that I have come to terms with what is needed in my life right now I have been feeling a lot better. And I know my goals will still be accomplished just in a little more time then I originally pictured. I have already grown so much because of my goal and this speed bump is just another obstacle to make me stronger. There is always some good to be found in every situation.


“You take the bad with the good, Rise up through it. Live in the mist of it. It's the bad that lets you know how good the good really is. Don't let the bad leave you thinking like there ain't any good. There is, and lots of it, too. ”

― Charles Martin,

Overcoming obstacles

“Courage isn't having the strength to go on - it is going on when you don't have strength.”

― Napoleon Bonaparte


Strength is not about not being weak. How you overcome your weaknesses determines your strength. If you don't challenge yourself to the utmost you will never have to really face being weak. You will never have to really deal with obstacles.

If you have never tried to conquer your own weaknesses then you haven't really triumphed in one of the greatest obstacles in life....yourself! When you conquer yourself which is never totally conquered because there will always be a weakness. There will always be triumph and struggle as long as you step out and live life to the utmost.

You have to be weak to be strong and you have to be strong to be weak. No matter what your life, you determine how you live. The people with the greatest struggle are sometimes the happiest. Why? Because they made a choice to be happy. The don't let life determine how they act and feel. No matter what the circumstance you control how you act and feel about it. Happiness cannot come from external forces. Happiness lies within us.

In my life I have struggled and conquered. I have been happy and I have been sad. I have been strong and I have been weak. When you feel that you are alone remember this struggle is something that everybody trying to do something worth doing goes through.


“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.”

― Criss Jami

Weightlifting and my life

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.” – Robert Francis Kennedy

Weightlifting is something I probably never would of imagined myself doing at any point in my life. My life brought me to it. It brought me to it so I can continue my journey of health and happiness. To strive to be the best I can be. Weightlifting is not just about picking up the barbell. It is about creating focus, being centered and believing in yourself. The barbell gives no forgiveness. If your life is off your lifts will be off. Life is about balance. 

Let the goal guide you

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.”

― Louisa May Alcott


A goal is not always achieved. Sometimes a goal is there to make you stronger and guide you in your life. The reason goal setting is so important is because you have short term goals that are realistic that will be accomplished to give you that self satisfaction and feeling of achievement. You have your long term goals to push you to strive to be the best. Even if you don't reach that goal you have achieved so much more then if you had no goal at all. The point is about not obtaining perfection but striving for perfection and getting as close as you can in your life. Being the best you can be as an individual. It is not about being better then others its about you. This is your goal, your life, and your journey.

Living in the present

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength."

-  Corrie Ten Boom

When you are trying to complete a task are you totally focused in that task or are you thinking about the next task you will have to complete after this one is done?

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and realized you didn't actually hear anything they said?

Have you ever gone for a drive and not remembered how you got to your destination?
The truth is things are moving faster and faster. Life is getting busier and busier. If we don't slow ourselves down life will pass before we even knew what happened.

I am sure everybody has heard of meditation and probably just thinks of it as some silly thing people do sitting up straight with their legs crossed. The truth is meditation is so much more then that. Something we all could use to find peace in a life that probably seems pretty chaotic most of the time.

Meditation is really about being present. It is about seeing all the little things around us that most of us miss on a daily basis. It is about focusing on your task at hand. It is about living without judgement and negativity.

There are so many different ways to meditate. If you just stop for a second during your busy day and focus on your breath for even just a minute. Feeling the air move in through your nose and into your chest. Feeling your chest or belly rise and fall with each breath. Really feeling how that breath affects your whole body. When you take a deep breath this activates the parasympathetic nervous system which gives you a relaxation response. Which I know almost all of us could use more of. Being stressed all the time causes disease, decreases your quality of life and happiness.

Kids actually meditate all the times but aren't really trying to and nobody thinks of it like that. Have you ever noticed for the most part how much happier a child is then an adult. They haven't developed judgements and negativity yet. When a child falls down they don't think of themselves as clumsy or compare themselves to the kid across the street saying I bet they don't do that. When they are exploring a new object, scent, or hearing something new they are not thinking about what they will be doing after that. They are totally in tune with what they are experiencing at the present moment. As an adult just imagine if you close your eyes and pick up a leaf but when you pick it up you didn't know what it was right away. As soon as we recognize the object we say oh yeah that is a leaf and we are done with it. Imagine if you didn't let yourself realize what it was you were touching and just let yourself be totally focused on how it felt without judgement. Every leaf feels different and if you just recognized it was a leaf and set it down you would miss the whole experience. This type of focusing is actually considered meditation. Focusing on the present task at the present time. Washing dishes, brushing your teeth, or taking a walk. Anything can be used as a meditation. And when you learn how to focus on the task at hand you will increase the quality of everything you try to do.

When you walk out to your car in the morning do you hear the birds chirping or are you in such a hurry that you miss it?

When someone cuts you off on the street do you make up a story about that person and why they are such a jerk? Truth is we have no idea why they cut us off. Maybe they are late for work or maybe they are on their way to the hospital for an emergency. For whatever the reason we will probably never know so when we get ourselves all upset and call them nasty names we are really only hurting and upsetting ourselves. This won't affect them at all. It will just bring negativity to our life. What if they cut you off and you just responded by saying gosh I hope everything is ok with them and their day gets better. Would that change things for you?

These are just a few things to think about to help bring greater awareness and happiness to your life. Try focusing on your breathing and seeing how it makes you feel. If your mind is cluttered with thoughts don't get angry that they won't go away just let them pass by. Just be like it is not time for you right now I am being with my breath. Another thing you can try is repeat this mantra to yourself and see how it makes you feel.

"May I be happy and peaceful. May I be healthy and strong. May I be safe and free. May I care for myself with ease and joy."

Now I know you may feel like this is a bit cheesy but remember you are doing this without judgement. You are your own best friend or your own worst enemy you make the choice. Be kind to yourself. And if life isn't going the way you want it to what can it hurt to try something new. Find what works for you whatever it is and make that part of your life.

Awakening

 "In all activities of life, the secret of efficiency

lies in an ability to combine two seemingly incompatible states: 

a state of maximum activity and a state of maximum relaxation."

~  Aldous Huxley

So this week has truly been an amazing week for me. I have discovered a whole new world that I have always had access to but never really tapped into. Most people would say this mind stuff is cheesy. Well that is only said by people who haven't experienced it. We all have so much much more potential inside of us then we ever realize. You don't need a magic pill. You have the power to control your own mind and body. It is not about striving for perfection it is about accepting your imperfections. It is about letting things go. Knowing when to worry about something and when that worry is doing you no good at all.

I have attended two days of my intro to meditation class. I have also been attending a relax and restore class at source yoga. It is basically an hour an a half of stretching and meditation. What I have noticed over the past couple weeks is at the beginning of the week my mind is running all day long without me being able to find the off button. When that happens my body is tense, overloaded, stressed and not in control of myself. At the end of the week after attending my yoga courses my mind is calm and I am relieved. My body is relaxed and I feel like I have let everything go and gained control again.

I realized over the weekend the challenge of working in a fast paced environment such as the hospital. Having to deal with emergencies and stressful and depressing situations. Then I thought to myself how do you remain calm inside but still move fast on the outside. Very challenging for sure. What I have learned in all my reading and education is you have to learn how to be in control when you are not under fire and then when the time comes you will be able to gain control under any situation. On Monday I decided I was going to take a couple minutes in the morning to practice my breathing before work. I don't know if that is what made the rest of my day amazing but something happened. My mind remained calm and I remained in control. I was able to focus on what I needed to be focusing on at that moment and let the rest be gone until it was time to think about those things again. My performance at work has improved as well as my performance in the gym. Yesterday at the gym I was able to power snatch 125lbs twice which is a 15lb increase from what I have ever done. I have been struggling with that for a while then all of a sudden it seems I figured something out. I attempted to clean 200lbs but just wasn't quite there. The great part is is that it doesn't even upset me. Sure I wanted it. I wanted it bad. But I will get it. It is just another obstacle but not one that will stop me. I will break though and that is the only attitude to have. If you don't believe you will do it you won't.

Think about this statement from the book body mind mastery by Dan Millman...

"To illustrate the effect of trying too hard, imagine walking across a four-inch-wide plank of wood suspended a few inches off the ground. No problem, right? Now raise the plank ten feet over a pond filled with alligators. Suddenly you begin trying harder. You feel tense. You have the same plank but a different mental state."

Interesting how our own mind prevents us from doing what we can do isn't it?